"Unforgiveness is the poison we drink hoping others will die."
I posted this quote a few weeks ago and got so many questions asking where it was from that I decided to do a book review for this little gem I recently finished reading.
I posted this quote a few weeks ago and got so many questions asking where it was from that I decided to do a book review for this little gem I recently finished reading.
This book is for you.
If you are young, old, married, single, male, female, or a thousand other descriptors - this book is for you. I was visiting my parents a few weeks ago and saw this title sitting on the shelf and asked to borrow it. I had seen it so many times over my time working at the bookstore, and was familiar with the author Ken Sande's most popular book The Peacemaker. This title is just over one hundred pages, and is a great summary of how to handle conflict through a biblical worldview.
Since we will always face conflict in life after Eden, it is an essential to our soul to be familiar with what God's word says about how to handle, maneuver through, repent in and move on from conflict. Disagreements and misunderstandings rarely come when we have planned out a biblical thought process, prayed and completely readied ourselves for a difficult situation. No, they more often come when we aren't looking, and can leave us blindsided, hurt, frustrated or angry.
This book was so helpful for me to have a more God centered view on what conflict is, and how to practically live out the "so far as it depends on you" portion of Romans 12:18. The author details our common sinful strategies to dealing with conflict: peacefaking or peacebreaking, followed by a look at what Scripture says for us to pursue as we navigate human relationships affected by sin. He exhorts us to action that will build true lasting peace, balanced with a long term gospel perspective of love and grace.
I would caution any reader to not see this as a recipe for what to do to fix broken relationships immediately . While it is helpful for framing your thoughts, actions and motives, ultimately we trust that all conflict is a "light and momentary affliction," and that it is still God who orchestrates and allows situations to be worked through according to His timing and will for our lives. Ultimately, as the author concludes, you can not measure your success by someone else's actions or response, but rather by being steadfastly obedient and submissive to the Word of God, regardless of the current outcome.
Its a quick read, with options for deeper discussion, that will be a great sharpening tool to any believer in any stage of life. I tucked this book away and want to read it with our kids when they are older. I think it will be a great discipleship tool to use as we teach our little ones what God says about conflict, and recognizing what we all bring to the table. I hope this encourages you if you are in the midst of conflict, or spurs you on to "excel stillmore" in practicing godliness.
XO, B
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